It seems something is in the air the last few months. I keep getting calls from clients about challenges they are having with team members and their continued frustration. What’s interesting for me is in every conversation they tell me how clear they were in their communication and yet nothing seems to change.
Their solution? Not to have these conversations any more, or as frequently since nothing changed and it caused their blood pressure to raise.
Let’s review why having difficult conversations are actually a good thing.
1. How is any team member going to improve if they don’t know where you think they are brilliant, and where they need development. Your role as a leader is to help grow, develop and mentor those who work for you.
2. Taking the time to sit with someone and have the difficult conversation says you care. If you don’t care enough to have conversations you don’t care about their development and them as people.
3. Ignoring a problem and hoping it will go away or get better on it’s own is foolish, and will only keep you annoyed and frustrated. Problems do not go away!
4. Team dynamics are a sensitive balance. If the situation impacts team members and they don’t feel like you are acknowledging the problem you will lose trust.
5. Sometimes these conversations bring forth information that help you make better decisions. Maybe the person isn’t well suited to the role, or perhaps an exit strategy is what’s in the best interest of everyone, or maybe they need more training. You won’t know until you speak with them.
6. You may learn something about yourself. Are you as clear in your message as you think? Can you be clearer about your expectations? Are you waiting weeks or even months to discuss a situation that should have been addressed on the spot?
7. A sense of relief occurs for both you and the person you are speaking with. I believe most people want to do a good job, and know when you are not happy with them, even if they don’t know why. They fret, worry and may even resign because they don’t know what to do differently. Knowing provides a sense of relief…now they can focus on what to do differently.
The bottom line, you are giving someone a gift by taking the time to talk to them. If you want to know HOW to have these conversations so they end more successfully read one of my recent articles 8 Steps for Having Difficult Work Conversations or Navigating Critical Conversations.
Next steps:
How we communicate with others can ease the path when having difficult conversations, or it can turn those conversations to confrontations.
Ever wonder how your communication style works for or against you when working with others? Would you like to learn your style and what to consider to get the results you want more often from your team? This communication assessment assesses your style and provides constructive ideas on areas of development.
