Hundreds, probably thousands of articles have been written about projecting confidence in front of an audience when you are making a presentation or giving a speech.  

Is that important?  

You bet it does…no matter what size of an audience you are in front of (1, 100 or 1000) daily you are missing opportunities to change the course of a meeting; the team coming together, or not; and even the trajectory of your own career.

A few months, ago a client came to me about preparing for a meeting where he was presenting to the board. He had his notes, powerpoints, had already figured out what he was going to wear and wanted my ideas on how to make the best impression.  

Honestly, he really didn’t need me to help him with this, which is what I told him.

However, I had observed him in meetings with his team, in one-on-one conversations with executives and sat with him while he conducted performance reviews.

He wasn’t horrible…  what became clear to me was that he wasn’t coming across as confident in any of those interactions.

Here’s what I saw and shared with him:

1. In the conversations with the executives, they asked lots and lots of questions.  Why? Because he didn’t come across as confident.

2. With the team meetings, he allowed them to meander, to go off topic, to have one or two people monopolize the conversation and in one, there was a team member that was so negative about everything it destroyed the morale of the rest of the attendees and everyone walked away complaining.

3. The performance reviews weren’t disastrous..but close. Yes, he communicated where they had done well, and what needed improvement.  In all three meeting, the employees pushed back when he commented on where they needed development. One even told him he was ‘out and out wrong’ about his impression.  This manager never took back control of the meeting, never stood in a place of confidence and authority and while I don’t know for sure I bet nothing will change, because it was clear who had control of the meeting, and even the content.

Confidence isn’t something to focus on when you have an important presentation, it’s how you show up day in and day out with every interaction you have with others.  

I could provide dozens of other examples but the bottom line is, don’t waste your time figuring out how to impress the big guys at an event and ignore other communication opportunities.  

Size doesn’t matter when it comes to interfacing with other human beings.  How you show up in every conversation will have an impact on your career and success more than just impressing the big boys.

Back to my story…

His team didn’t see him as a leader, they saw him as a guy who ran meetings and had his name on the door.  

They also did not see him as the guy to go to for handling problems, mentoring, coaching or development. They only saw him as the guy who checked off the boxes during performance reviews or meetings.

Since that conversation months ago, he learned to recognize where his communication was off, and how it impacted perceptions of him.  He’s made a big shift, and as a result of how others respond to him has been amazing.

One of the biggest changes is that he’s taken control of his meeting where his team now walks away with a clear course of action.  And as a result, his team is happier and more productive and they feel like their time hasn’t been wasted.

And…they now know what they are supposed to be working on.

Have you found yourself in a similar situation?

Do you only think you need to project confidence in formal presentations?  If so, I want you to look at all of your interactions as a presentation no matter the size.

How you come across and project yourself is important.  

If you think you need help to refocusing your attention and energy from the Big Event to every event and improve your impact.  Reach out to me and let’s talk.